Competitve Much? So Am I

I'm currently participating in a boot camp (VERY early in the morning) and I'll be the first to admit it - I'm HELLA (for those not from the Bay Area, hella = very) competitive. I like to finish first, I like to win, I like to beat everyone, even if it's just in my mind. And you would think that it is all in my mind because we're not actually set up as a competition. We're not racing each other and there's definitely no prize if you finish first (except to do the exercises alotta more times). Yet, I know it's not only in my mind. I can feel those ladies on my heels, see them in my periphery and it makes me work a little bit harder, run a little bit faster. While there are definitely some mornings where I just don't got it, they are few and far in between because I'm going to win. I also like to win at Scrabble, Bejeweled Blitz, card games, spelling bees, and calculating the appropriate tip on the restaurant bill. (What do you mean, that's not a game?)

Despite my uber-competitive nature, I will not win by any means necessary. I don't "accidentally" trip, bump or elbow anyone so I can be first. More importantly, it does not affect my very healthy ego when someone else does win (but I will play you over and over again until I do). Unfortunately, there are a lot of people who do not compete fair and square; they will sabotage your science experiment or steal your shoe laces. Remember that saying from childhood, cheaters never win and winners never cheat? That was pretty much a lie. Cheaters win all the time. Their souls may be dark and their auras black, but they still own Boardwalk and Park Place.

There are some things, though that we compete over but don't need to. Houses, cars, husbands, wives, jobs, money, vacations, longest hair; you name it, there are people out there who are competing for it. But they're not competing with Joe Schmoe out there, they are competing with their friends and family. You know who they (you?) are. They like to flaunt whatever it is they have, whether it be their new 102 in television or the top of the line kazoo they got on ebay (it harmonizes really well). Some people are just plain braggarts; they like to boast about whatever it is they have going on. However, there are some people who are obviously trying to be the Joneses that you are to keep up with.

What's the difference you ask? Ah, let me give you some examples:

Braggart: Look at my new watch! Isn't it awesome? It's a Kardashian.
Jones: Have you heard about the new line of Kardashian watches? It's like a Rolex, but with more diamonds and you get a free eyeliner with it. I just picked mine up. I'm so glad I don't have to be on the waiting list. Oh wait, aren't you on the waiting list?

Braggart: OMG, I just got front row tickets to the Ray J concert. Isn't that awesome? Maybe he'll sign my picture of Whitney.
Jones: I just got box tickets to Ray J's show. Of course, I didn't have to pay for them, as I've known him for so long. Didn't you want to go to that concert? Too bad tickets are sold out...at least the ones that are worth anything.

Braggart: My son can dunk! Isn't that awesome? Holler at a scholar...ship!
Jones: Did you see my son dunk in the last game? I know he's been practicing really hard, but it's obvious he's got that natural talent. What about Junior...has he gotten to play yet?

The difference between a braggart and a Jones is that the braggart is genuinely happy...for themselves. They are excited about what they have going on and want to share it with you (or everyone). While they may not necessarily be fun to be around all the time, they are essentially harmless. A Joneses attitude on the other hand, is trying to make you feel small and less-than for not having what they have. Everything they have is bigger, better, shinier, fabulouser and more important than what you have. Especially because they say so. Interestingly enough, these type of people are actually quite insecure; they can only feel good about themselves by making others feel bad. That's the only way they can "win."

Admittedly, it can be difficult not to get caught up in their game. Although I'm pretty happy with my life, there are things I wouldn't mind doing or having access to. It can be hard to swallow when that dumbass co-worker/frenemy/family member is doing/buying/getting something I want and they're throwing it in my face. However, if they feel the need to throw it in your face, you can either slap them as hard as you can or you can act genuinely happy for them, thus not giving them the satisfaction of you appearing to be jealous (even if you really are).

Life is too short to compete; there's no real measure of who's life is better. We can only judge by what we see and we often do not have an accurate picture of what's going on beneath the surface. The person who has "everything" may be getting beat by their partner or may not be able to have children or are filing for bankruptcy; we rarely know the whole story. Keep that in mind the next time you deal with a Jones. It's important to work toward improving your life - as long as it's what makes you happy, not what everyone else thinks should make you happy. So go ahead, pull out the kazoo you got from the box of Cocoa Krispies and harmonize with the best of them!