En Vacances!

A couple weeks ago, I mentioned that I have planner tendencies but I've been accused many times (usually by the same person) of being a full-fledged planner. While I maintain that it's all relative, there is one thing I'm most excellent at planning: vacations. I have it down to a science that involves algorithms, spreadsheets and the time/space continuum. Oh, and a smidgen of imagination, creativity and if at all possible, a passport.

I'm not telling you this because I won't be writing my blog this week (clearly), I'm telling you this because it's very important for everyone to go on vacation. Time is flying folks and where have you been? On your couch? No bueno, c'est mal! (It sounds more interesting in foreign languages.) It's easy to pooh pooh the idea of going somewhere because it costs too much money, it's a pain in the ass to get folks together, the flights are too long, you have kids in school, blah, blah, blah. Those are all sorry excuses because vacations don't necessarily have to be expensive...especially if you plan it right. Even the 99% need to go somewhere.

As a nation of workaholics, it's unfortunate that we don't get the amount of vacation that we deserve and actually really need. Most of us get a pathetic two weeks every year; it's even worse when it's combined with our sick time. Two weeks is barely the amount of time necessary to truly relax and decompress from the stresses of work. When we are stressed out, we are more prone to illness, fatigue, mental health issues and weight gain (booty-do). So as one friend succinctly said once, "Get on a f*cking plane and go somewhere!"

Here's how you plan a vacation:

1. Decide what kind of vacation you want to have. Do you like doing nothing on the beach? (Um, hell yeah!) Are you into museums and architecture? Do you prefer a specific kind of climate?
2. When do want to go? For how long?
3. How much vacation/PTO do you have available currently? How much will you have by the time you intend to go?
4. Who do you want to travel with?
5. Once you've figured out all of that stuff, do some research on places to stay, local culture, money, etc.
6. Buy the ticket.
7. Get on a f*cking plane, train or automobile. (Yes, I know you're supposed to get in an automobile, hush.)
8. Do not check work email. Do not check work voicemail. Do not call work. Don't even let them know where you're going.
9. Relax.

It seems like a long list and items 1-4 can be quite difficult to figure out, particularly item #4, your travel buddy. As an avid traveler, I've learned that not all friends are meant to travel together; relationships have been damaged, sometimes irreparably, after folks go on vacation together. My preference is to travel with someone, but it can be a real pain in the ass trying to coordinate everyone's vacation time and money. I just plan a trip and hope that someone can join me. If they can, great, if they can't, I'm still going. Don't be afraid to travel alone; sometimes the most interesting and fortuitous experiences happen because you're by yourself. Plus, you get to do whatever you want. You want to spend all day shopping? Do it. You want to lay on the beach, reading and drinking a pina colada? Great idea. You want to go rock climbing? Excellent. Just be smart and aware of your environment, especially if you're a woman traveling solo, and you'll be fine.

Any ideas yet on where you're going?

Even if you're doing something more local within driving distance, the same vacation principles apply. The point is that you are taking a break from the humdrum/chaos of your daily life. I believe it's best done far, far away, but not everyone has enough PTO or money to do that. However, you can take a vacation; there are plenty of low budget options and if you think about it, maybe you turn that shoe money into vacation money. Believe it or not, it's highly unlikely that your office will implode without you there. Actually, if you don't take a break, it can increase the likelihood that things will fall apart because your ass is exhausted and burned out. I'm pretty sure you don't get a bonus for having a heart attack due to stress.

Alas, I am practicing what I preach. While your eating your lunch at your desk, I'll be on my way to converse at another bar in another country. Don't hate...observate, notate, imitate and vacate!