I believe that when we hit our thirties, we start reflecting on what we really want in life. I could just be thinking that because I'm in my thirties (as are most of my friends), but it seems like things slow down a bit after our frenetic twenties. Whether it be children, a new job/career, a house, a cabana boy, or a new romantic relationship, we are looking for that one thing that's going to make our life great/wonderful/amazing/complete.
Boy, is that sh*t elusive!
In all honesty, my life is pretty good. In the grand scheme of things, I can't really complain. But on the small and insignificant scheme of things, there are a lot of things that I imagine/fantasize/assume will make my life even gooder. I don't know how I'm going to get them (the sugar daddy plan isn't panning out), but I truly believe that my life would be perfect if it weren't for these few things I'm lacking. Would you like to know what these things are? They may sound like some things that would make your life perfect too!
1. A chef
2. An on-call masseuse
3. A new car that drives really fast...because my driver has to get me around quickly
4. A lovely house with over-stuffed, super comfy furniture, with lots of bright colors and plants...that are lovingly taken care of by my housekeeper
5. A flat in Paris
6. Access to a private plane to take me to my flat in Paris
7. A job that pays a lot of money but does not require a huge time commitment (does Oprah have a therapist?)
See? Just a few things.
In all seriousness, it's very easy to get caught up in what we don't have...especially if the people around us have some of those things. Of course, I don't know anyone who has any of the things on my list, so that's just pure fantasy. However, there are times when I think about what I would like for my life that some of my friends do have and it makes me a little bit sad. Interestingly enough, some of them feel the same way about my life.
How do we deal with the feeling that the grass is greener? It's all about how we look at the situations that make us feel this way. Here are some common complaints I hear around the bar:
Situation #1: Being single.
Sad-sack glasses: No one wants me, I'm going to die alone surrounded by cats and old porno magazines.
Rose-tinted glasses: Freedom. I get to do what I want, when I want (to who I want, hubba hubba) and I only have to answer to myself.
Situation #2: Being married.
Sad-sack glasses: Damn, I'm stuck with this f*cker for the rest of my life. I'll never get to experience new booty again.
Rose-tinted glasses: I have someone who loves me unconditionally and who I love unconditionally. And we have a notarized agreement that they will change my diaper when we get old.
Situation #3: Living in an apartment.
Sad-sack glasses: I'm just throwing money away and have nothing to show for it.
Rose-tinted glasses: I can just pack up and move when I want/need to. When something breaks, I'm not responsible for fixing it. Not all my money goes into maintaining my residence.
Situation #4: Owning a house.
Sad-sack glasses: I'm stuck with a mortgage payment and when this money-trap needs any repairs, it's coming out of my wallet.
Rose-tinted glasses: I'm investing in my future and building up assets. And no one is tap-dancing on my ceiling.
Situation #5: Work.
Sad-sack glasses: I hate my job/I work too much/Don't make enough money.
Rose-tinted glasses: I'm going to let my dissatisfaction with my job motivate me to find something I love and compensates me well.
Situation #6: Having a small booty.
Sad-sack glasses: I don't have a booty like Serena Williams. Why have thou forsaken me?!
Rose-tinted glasses: Sorry, can't come up with anything on this one.
Of course, it's much easier said than done to focus on the positive aspects of our lives. For whatever reason, we like to complain and make ourselves feel bad for what we don't have. (Or have too much of - booty-do anyone?) While I can poke my lip out about not having a chef and masseuse on staff (or having the kind of life that requires a staff), it's a waste of time, because none of that stuff is going to happen today. And probably not tomorrow either. I prefer to focus on what's going well in my life and to work on the things that I would like to change.
Unless we're conversing at the bar, of course. We can talk/complain/cry/celebrate about anything you want. :)
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